So like, in two weeks? Going to Toronto for a date with that I guy I talked about before, David. Told him I was into him a week or so ago and he said he was into me, too, so I'm heading up to meet him. We're gonna go do the CN Tower (LOL CUE ME BEING PATHETIC, AEROPHOBIA WOOO), have dinner and then go see the Frog Princess.
I'm excited, but... really nervous. What if once I see him, I don't like him as much? It'd be a huge let down for
both of us, and I'd feel horrible about it. What if I'm just awkward? I mean, I know I'm always "I want someone to love me" yadda yadda, but actually
getting that or something close is... oddly surreal. Like it's not really happening, I'm just imagining it and it's all just a big game of pretend that'll end, or that it'll never really feel like it's happening to
me. Or maybe that'll change when I meet him. Or maybe it won't. Or. Nrgh.
Not only is he insisting on paying for things (Why must boys always do that?!) aparently he got me something, too. People doing those sorts of things make me uncomfortable, I don't know what it is. I don't like spending a lot of money, even on myself, so I suppose it's because I don't know how to repay them properly for whatever? I'm afraid of taking advantage of people who are generous, when I don't know how to do something equal in return for them that's in my power. And I'm not good with giving. And David is super generous and ghnnngaskhgdfg I DON'T KNOW WAUGHRGH.
tl;dr: Girl is meeting boy. Girl has worries about meeting boy. Girl has concerns about her own behavior, triggered by boy.
Waaah T A T Current Mood: 
tired
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